Why Pain?

I talked with a friend on the phone a few months ago about some lessons she has been learning. The lessons hurt in the learning and she was a little discouraged by the amount of pain she was experiencing. Since that time, for whatever reason, God has been bringing this concept of pain to my mind, again and again and again.

I'm not sure why. Frankly, it's not something I'm experiencing right now. Sure, I've been looking for a job for the last 3 months, but God has provided the money I need when I need it. Sure, I'm 24 and still living at home, but God has given me parents who are open to that so I can better accomplish the ministry God has placed me in right now. None of those things are really trials in my life right now. And this focus on how to respond correctly to pain scares me a bit.

The question that keeps circulating is why I am allowed to go through pain. It's a question we all ask, whether in the midst of the difficult time or removed from it. Both Job, who was experiencing pain, and his friends, who were not, asked the question and gave various reasons, both ignorant and well informed. Why would my friend have to experience intense pain, just to learn a lesson God had for her? Why would God give an assistant pastor and close in my church a child who needed to be in the ICU for 2 out of the last 8 months when he already had too much on his plate? What is the deal with all this pain?

The Bible deals pretty extensively with this problem of pain. Whole books are devoted to the subject of what to do when trials come. 1 Peter is written to a church in exile, hiding for their lives. James has a lot to say about how to respond to "divers temptations." Any one of Paul's letters has something to say about pain and one of the key passages on the issue is in 2 Corinthians 12. Why is this such a big topic? Job says that "man is born for trouble, as the sparks fly upward" (Job 5:7). Sparks are a natural result of a fire; trouble is a natural result of being born. Westley, in The Princess Bride, has it correct: "Life is pain...Anyone who tries to tell you differently is selling something."

So if it's a such a sure thing, as sure as death and taxes, what do I make of it? What do I do with it? God's answer is pretty clear. Embrace it.

Which isn't a happy prospect. I'm not talking about looking for it. I'm not even talking about enjoying it. Accept it. Bear it. Embrace it.

Think about it this way. James teaches that God is the "Father of Lights, with whom is not variableness neither shadow of turning." He is a good God who cannot change. He is so consistently good, it ought to bore us to tears. He gives only good things. Also, according to Isaiah, His thoughts are not our thoughts. What He sees as good is not always what we see as good. Whatever He puts in your life, whether you understand or not, He sees as a good gift. So embrace it as one.

God values very different things than we do. We value comfort, happiness, security, and wealth. God values His glory, His purposes, and His plan. In our lives, the things He values show up as one thing: Christ-likeness. That's what He's shooting for in those difficult times. He wants you "to be conformed to the image of His son" (Romans 8:29). He wants you to learn the lessons.

My friend, that assistant pastor I mentioned earlier, has said several times, that he wishes he could go back to the beginning of his son's medical problems, not to find a way around them, but to do them over again, better. God has used that situation in he and his wife's lives to teach them about their own shortcomings in Christ-likeness. Likewise, my friend who I talked to on the phone was confronted with pain because she was missing the mark of Christ-likeness as well. The trials I have experienced have largely resulted in a better understanding of my failures to measure up to the Christ-life. And those are areas that are crystal clear, top priority areas of change for me today.

The pain made the lessons memorable. My friends and I will never forget the lesson God taught us in the midst of pain. Another assistant pastor at my church mentioned a quote to me from a book he was reading: "Experience [pain] is the greatest teacher, for it gives the exam first and the lesson later." We learn better when pain is involved, because we first see our failure and then learn the lesson to correct it.

When pain comes, don't shy away, afraid of it. Embrace it. The lessons you learn will stick with you for life.